doing it for the kids:
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Posted: April 8th 2008
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Tracky bottoms tucked in socks. Namechecked by the Arctic Monkeys on ‘A Certain Romance’ as recently as 2006, but as a touchline look, it goes back much further than that.
I won’t pretend to know why it started, but my guess would be that it was purely practical – much like bike clips (remember them?) stopped your flapping trousers from getting caught in your spokes or chain. As for when…well I’m sure I have dim childhood memories of Bill Shankly pioneering the look, and where the great man led, others were sure to follow. The 80s ushered in the era of the ‘tracksuit manager’, and we were off and running. Graham Taylor – tracky bottoms always tucked in socks.
Me, I think it looks stupid. Particularly when the person sporting the look is a tubby forty-something hollering “second ball! second ball!!!” at a bunch of confused, scared nine year olds. My irrational hatred of the style probably comes from the Nazi who made my own son’s footballing life a misery when he was nine. Tracky bottoms tucked in socks was his trademark (the Nazi, not my son). He was bald, wiry thirty-something rather than tubby forty-something, but no matter. He was the type of man who gives kids’ football a very very bad name – and his tracky bottoms were always tucked in socks.
In my subsequent years on the touchlines of youth football, I’ve come across many engaging, sporting characters that have sported the look. I’ve had to bite my lip. Sometimes it’s taken 2 or 3 meetings for me to accept them as the warm, wonderful human beings they undoubtedly are. For judging a book by its cover read judging a fellow human being by their dress code, and that applies as much on the touchline as anywhere else.
First and foremost, the majority of kids’ football managers and coaches are “doing it for the kids”. The temptation to get carried away with going for trophies and cricket score wins is ever present, but most of us manage to resist. However, deep down I’m sure most of us would admit it’s also a final sporting fling before we draw down the curtain once and for all on our own (ahem) ‘careers’. This applies in the sartorial stakes too.
In truth, most of us never played to much of a level in the first place. Some still limp through a weekly game of five-a-side where for half an hour we show some young whippersnappers a trick or two before age takes its toll and they run rings round us for the remainder of the session. But prancing around in training gear and football boots / trainers a couple of times a week with “the kids” is our last hurrah (or for some, maybe the hurrah they never had).
Up til the age of 11 or so, most of your charges look on, if not in awe, then certainly respectfully. Not long after that, they suss that they’re better than you ever were (at both football and style), and don’t need a second invitation to point the fact out. One of my teams has gone through this stage. I sometimes wonder if I’d win back their respect (and that of their parents, who all know just how fat and unfit I am) if I went for the suit, tie and smart overcoat look on the touchline. Capello, Mourinho…there are certainly good role models. Not Rafa – his suits are always ill fitting, and topped off with that LFC training puffa jacket….well if I may paraphrase Alex Turner again, that’s the footballing equivalent of the “t shirt & tie combination”.
Pro-Star, Stanno, Jako…these are the big names on the ‘yoof’ touchlines, along with the odd enterprising local brand. Wafer thin cagoules (sorry, ‘touchline jackets’) in club colours are de rigeur. The clubs from the posh areas my have the deluxe versions (heavyweight material…and fleece-lined!). There is a worrying preponderance of yellow or orange strips. Kit designs for the most part look like those ones that the market leaders in ‘real’ football rejected…in 1983.
Actually, both Nike and Puma are beginning to cash in on their ‘instant brand recognition status’ with youngsters by edging into the market with cheap gear that isn’t any better designed than that served up by Stanno & co. but….”well, it’s Nike, innit?” Given that a decade or so ago, Nike didn’t even bother with ‘soccer’ much at all, and seeing how all powerful they are now – well, here’s another market they could no doubt dominate if they can be bothered. Coming out of a sweatshop near you soon…
Oh, one more bug bear. For my sins, when I started out on this road, I did have the Stanno cagoule (sorry, touchline jacket) in club colours…and yes, it did have my initials emblazoned across it. I don’t know what came over me. I didn’t need to hear my friends’ sniggers, I felt like a prat every time I put it on – but for a full two seasons I did so because…well, it’s what we all do. Get to an away ground you’ve not been to before and how do you spot the oppo manager? Tracky bottoms tucked in socks may be optional, but the cagoule in club colours is the tell tale sign – and the initials help confirm you’re talking to the manager you spoke with on the phone, not one of his legion of assistants.
It’s gone now. I have a rather natty black designer cagoule that serves me well in spring, summer and autumn. It has dozens of zip pockets that give it a bit of a “King’s Road 76” feel whilst also proving very practical for whistles, registration cards and the like. However, I need to find something that looks sporty, fashionable and managerial for the long, cold winter months. The wife has threatened to burn my Nike puffa (ok, in truth it is a bit Rafa), and I refuse to wear my Stone Island “duvet disguised as winter coat” number to football. Hmmm…maybe Paul Smith Sport is a good starting point…though only at eBay prices…