doing it for the kids: diary of a youth football gaffer childhood obesity: football to blame

Posted: June 8th 2008
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Kids’ football never stops. Whilst the pros take June off (or July if you’ve strutted your stuff in a showpiece international tournament), poor mites aged 7 and upwards are dragged round their county by unforgiving, glory-seeking managers who, having missed out on that season’s League title, see the numerous summer tournaments as a chance to grab some silverware.

These events vary, 5- 6- or 7-a-side with minor rule changes from one week to the next. Particularly at the younger age groups, after the group stage there is usually a ‘Plate’ competition in addition to the main Cup. This means middle (and some lower) – ranking teams still get to play a knock out comp against teams of similar standard, so there is indeed more silverware to go round.

This gives hundreds of 9 year olds nationwide a chance to jump up & down chanting ‘campeones campeones ole ole ole’ (or to be more precise, an anglicised ‘championes’). Which is surely a good thing.

But that is not what concerns us here. Oh no. Never mind the football, what about the burgers, chips, sweets, doughnuts and fizzy drinks? If I may paraphrase Lee Apprentice, “THAAAT’S WHAT I’M TAAAWKIN’ ABAAAHT!”

We read almost daily about Britain’s growing childhood obesity problem. With equal regularity we are bombarded with stories about how far behind we are falling in footballing terms…how we need to address this as a matter of urgency at grass roots kids’ level…and how we only have 4 years to get together a winning team for London 2012 or (hopefully) the 2018 World Cup on home soil…

So putting all these stories of the moment together, one has to ask why kids’ football tournaments are dominated by vendors from the Diets From Hell Association?

Burger van? Check. Sweet stall? Check. Wide variety of pop? Check. Sugar-coated doughnuts? Check. Chips? But of course. Fresh fruit, bottled water, smoothies…you’re having a laugh.

At tournos, giving your kids money to spend on the above-mentioned delicacies Is obligatory. Those whose parents force them to eat bananas thoughtfully packed at home have scorn poured on them. No teams bother with the recommended warm ups or cool downs, it’s chips / game / burger / game / doughnut / game…and whoops, the kids are all pink, we must have forgotten the sun cream.

To Messrs Brooking & Platini I say, we’ve a long