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bradley headstone - drawn to any world cup disgrace

And so it begins...

Posted: June 29th 2010
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The greats of English football spit their venomous distaste at the screen; Dixon, Shearer and Hansen are disgusted. Yet did we really witness anything we were not honestly expecting. Germany proved that they were a young team prepared to play football, England proved that they were just not good enough.

Never has a score line been so spot on. Forget the goal that never was, an irrevealance that merely allows us to shut up any German whining about Russian linesman, 4-1 was just right. England were  thoroughly woeful at the back and impotent up front and as the recriminations begin let’s not forget a few salient points.

The Daily Mail will no doubt be leading on the ‘non-German’ nature of our opponents, the Pole who scored the first, the Turk who ran midfield, the Pole who scored the second, the Ghanaian who laughed at Milner and Cole…I could go on. Rather than focusing on the unity of this very European team or the inability of English football to encourage immigrants to make a difference in England, they’ll no doubt whine about the iniquity of it all.

Germany comfortably handled England, I’m not sure they’ll go all the way, their defence in truth is little better than England’s, but the suggestion from the BBC’s commentator that only two of their line up would get into England’s team is laughable. Honestly I could almost make a case for Ashley Cole, but Mueller or Gerrard…it’s no contest. Germany have five forwards in better form than Rooney and even though Mertesaker and Friedrich are the second worst central defensive partnership in the tournament (Terry and anyone being the worse), England had no real cutting edge.

If we are going to point fingers, and you will, think before you point at Capello (are you listening Harry Redknapp? You can’t buy an England team you saggy faced idiot!). But if you insist, let’s do it properly, in 1990 the idea of a Premiership was given a fair wind by England bumbling through a tournament to the semi-finals. A combination of better stadiums after a number of tragic disasters and the first trickle of good foreign imports rode the wave of public interest and football exploded. Rich men got richer as football invested in an elite league, everything else was left to rot. It would take a generation but England are ready to reap what the Prem has sowed.
We are about to enter an unprecedented dearth of talent. It will combine with a generation of barely adequate overpaid young players that will one day make us look back fondly at today’s hiding.

If I’m right then interest in football will wane (a little), attendances will drop, English clubs will fail in the Champions league leading to 3 rather than 4 entries, the financial incentives for staying in the Premiership will fade, Bolton, Blackburn, Wolves and Birmingham will start playing football and the parachute payments will stop distorting the real football leagues.

No one will go to watch England at Wembley…apart from those debenture holders who were conned into ten years of misery. The bankrupted FA will only get a Government bail out if they spend money on youth development. A good point to remember that you voted for a government with no interest in football, but it’ll be ten long years to get going again.

The big five (I couldn’t care less who they are) will leave for a European super league, the country cries for literally seconds.

Let Harry Redknapp take over, let us fail to qualify for Euro 2012 and let’s burn his house down, let’s strap Alan Green to the pyre (for no other reason that it’ll make us feel better), let’s keep picking Gerrard and Lampard, not because we still believe they are good enough but because they should be held up to public ridicule. Above all, let’s turn into idiots every couple of years and get utterly unrealistic with our expectations. There is a rotten smell lingering around English football, Scudamore, Richards, Alan Green et al. I’ll wager we’ll just try to ignore it again.

But let’s look on the bright side as we haul down our flags of St George…tournaments improve without England, what a boost for South Africa 2010.