blades blog Don't panic Mr Mainwaring

Posted: May 29th 2009
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Saddened and disappointed I think best describes it.

Not angry and bitter, but something more akin to the teacher who has to tell off the normally well-behaved child and say: “ . . . but you young Blade,  I am surprised and extremely disappointed at you being involved in an incident like this. What on earth would your parents say if they knew what had happened?”

Saddened and disappointed because it could well signal the end of another chapter in Blades history. Chapters are generally being re-written on a season-by-season basis these days as eras once dominated by long-serving managers and captains and keepers now seem a thing of the past. But we’re in the middle of one at Bramall Lane that doesn’t yet need to come to an end.

I’m all for ringing the changes when they’re needed. Newcastle hope they’ve closed a monumentally disastrous chapter. If the freefall is immediately halted, with good management and a dose of luck, their continued rampant support will see them trim off the rancid fat next season to emerge a leaner and more profitable beast ultimately making them a much more financially viable proposition for Premiership survival than the current bottom eight clubs in that league.

So it’s not necessarily the play-off-final result which has left me morose – after all, Burnley simply carried on doing to us what they had done in this season’s two league encounters – no, my sadness comes from what the result might mean. All this talk of players considering their futures. Kev’s wobble of honesty offering his head on the Made in Sheffield silver platter, it’s all very knee jerky and unnecessary even though I appreciate it’s statutory fare for today’s obligatory post-match recrimination period. But it would be a pity to take the strawberries back to the corner shop because there’s a couple of squashed ones in the corner and they smell a bit off.

Paddy had nothing to do in goal and the defence was sound as a pound with my much-hyped Kyles proving my men-of-the-game. Aside from a brave Monty performance in which he could at least prove fighting spirit and guts among his attributes on the day, the midfield section of the 4-5-1was anonymous and the line was led by a man who had proved himself incapable of the job many, many weeks ago. This was always going to be an uphill task – where on earth did anyone expect the goals to come from?

I watched the game at an ex-pat friend’s house, a hot water bottle at my lower back, and found myself at the centre of a frenzy of texts and mobile calls to people at the match. When the team was announced my mobile was positively euthanasic such was the depth of morbidity which greeted the formation and the striker.  Long before the kick-off we were convinced that a difficult tie had just been made impossible. Everyone I know, and I mean everyone, predicted that Burnley would frustrate us from playing footy by pressuring us and that, as a result, we would revert to playing hoofball at Wembley. Sometimes, as a supporter, it is frustratingly annoying to be right.

And this is where I have to stand up and say I told you so, since the start of the season. I wobbled in my steely assuredness when we overcame Preston so comprehensively (though not in the scorelines) and got caught up on the so-what-if-we’re-not-good-enough-let’s-get-up-anyway-and-sort-it-out-later bandwagon. But ultimately, I was right. We didn’t have what it took to get up and no amount of handballs, failed penalty shouts (Walker didn’t really have a case in my opinion but Howard would not have gone down without feeling Alexander’s knee in the back of his own) and mardy bumness will change the situation. Wendies, Brummies and Hammers have strayed onto our forums to suggest we sue the ref, sue the groundsman, sue the turf and sue the stadium. As always, the facts of a season speak for themselves – automatic promotion was lost with a defeat at home to the Wendies and/or a draw at home to struggling Forest, simple as that. My only surprise is that we made a much better stab of it than I thought we were capable of. We should never have been allowed to get to where we did though – the Championship should be better than that.

And what of Blackwell? Well, the give-him-a-break school of thought is that his formations have been forced on him by the injuries to Henderson and Ward. But the less generous appraisal is that too often he’s acting like a graduate from the University of Warnock – free flowing footy when you’re on top but revert to hoofball the minute you’re under pressure. Play to the bigman, pack the midfield and you’ll ensure a close result even if you lose. The system has its merits and in the Championship can take you far – our average league position over the last six seasons in the Championship is fifth – but can it really take you all the way?

I had to learn shorthand as a young journalist and we were given a choice of Teeline (dead easy to learn and get up to the statutory 100 words per minute but hard to go any further) or Pitmans (harder to learn but easier to push on up to the high and much more impressive 250 words a minute). Human nature being what it is we all chose Teeline and sped up to 120 wpm but could never get any further. I think our system can push us further on but what’s the point when it really isn’t good enough to keep you up in the Premiership.

My view is that we employ the heavyweight midfield because there isn’t a single player either a) willing to take the responsibility of midfield playmaker or b) skilful enough to fulfil the role. Not since Michael Brown lit up S2 has there been a United player capable of collecting the ball in the centre circle, protecting his own possession while he assesses the positions of his colleagues and then spraying balls out to attacking positions each of which is a potential goal scoring opportunity. Nor has there been an attacking midfield player who scored so many goals or who was at least willing to have a pop at goal at the merest hint of a keeper straying from his line.

So rather than end this chapter acrimoniously, let’s play to our strengths. Instead of running around like headless chickens blaming all manner of excuses, why can’t we take it on the chin and learn from our mistakes. Let’s regroup, rethink the style and substance of our formation and find the appropriate playing staff to fit a new mould in which the Kyles, Killa, Paddy and Morgan will sit happily. But please let’s be risky at times and let the talent shine through that will ultimately make 4-5-1 an irrelevance.

In 2003 I ditched all the play-off final merchandise because it held bitter memories but I shall continue wearing my “Sheffield’s finest” t-shirt featuring Kyle Naughton because he and Walker and the Academy are our future. Let’s hope we can continue to enjoy their skills rather than count the pennies from their sale.